these follies are within you and shine through you like the water in an urinal

I saw The Two Gentlemen of Verona on the Elizabethan stage in Ashland the other night. Imagine my surprise when, in Act IV, the Mantua outlaws bounded upon stage in full goth gear, blue mohawks and all (all this in a replica of the original Globe Theatre). They have a sense of humor, those Oregon Shakespeare Festivalians.

So.

My body is adjusting back to pacific standard time. I’m not sure if I feel at home exactly; Oregon was home, but now I associate it more with being on vacation, so I’m not sure what it is I feel here. Displacement, perhaps.

It feels a little empty, sleeping alone. Very empty.

I am suddenly aware that I have gotten very little affection, affirmation and support from any of the guys I’ve dated in the last five years.

“Ask me how it feels to vie.”

Of all the guys I’ve been with, not one had ever looked me in the eye and said I was worth the effort.

Sad, but true.

(thank you, B)